First of all, to cover Sparky... Yes, she has a boyfriend. They know each other from church and school and have for over a year. This summer they spent a lot of time
Do you like how I just dropped that juicy nugget in there... Did you have to re-read that one?
First of all, a public service announcement: If you know us in real life, not just the bloggy realm (you know who you are...) and especially if you are local, please let them tell you and others!
But yes... The Boy (I really need a new name for him) asked Cate to marry him and she said yes! (After he asked her father then sought out both of our blessing.) I should be freaking out... My 19 year old daughter plans to marry soon after her 20th birthday next year, and she plans to marry the boy she has been dating only two months, but I'm not... It is so clear that this is right... They have been on this path since they met... They are amazing together and they both truly love the LORD. I am truly happy for them.
So, are you sitting down... There is more news...
They quit college... And we are happy about it...
No, we are not nuts... If they hadn't made this decision together Paul planned to go down and remove Cate. You see, it wasn't at all what they advertised it to be. We knew it was a small school, but we were misled as to exactly how small. We were told they never accept more then 20 student to each class in order to keep classes intimate... How many people does that lead you to believe go to school there? Well, Cate and the Boy were 2/3 of the entire student body! Yes, there were only 3 students in the entire school. Also, (possibly due to the size) the classes were a joke... Cate said the home school co-op we belonged to in TN was more organized and the classes more thought out... Here is the problem with that... We were paying for her to go to school there. $4000 a semester... $800 a class... One class was called "personal leadership"... It was a daily devotions class. The book they used was a devotional book... Like one you might order to do in a small group, but not pay $800 for. But that was only one aspect... The other problem was in their doctrine. We knew the church that "sponsors" the college has somewhat different doctrine then we as a family subscribe to. We spoke to them at length about this, but apparently to no avail. They seemed open to accepting students from different backgrounds, or we thought so... It turns out they have some beliefs that we can only describe as unbiblical and they seemed very intent on forcing Cate and the Boy into these beliefs. I don't want to go into detail here, but it was a bad fit. There were many other reasons this decision was made, (like their two week window to withdraw was closing) but again I don't want to bash anyone... They plan to figure out where the LORD wants them school wise and pursue it next fall... As a couple.
Which brings me back to the engagement... Yes, we are fully supportive. These two are deeply bonded in a way only the LORD could do. Their relationship has been a time that could only be described as a "pressing" and it seems to have bonded them to each other and the LORD. If you remember, soon after they started officially "dating" his brother died a horrible and untimely death... And they were both in the room to witness it. They had to deal with that, and all the subsequent things that resulted from it. They also had a good mutual friend spiral out of control this summer and try to take anyone not deep rooted in their faith with her. (Our youth group is still reeling and rebuilding.) Then there was the short lived, but extremely stressful school experience... One of the (many) reasons they left was that the leadership there did not support their dating. In fact, they were open with us that it was their goal to force them apart. It was their personal view that they are too young to be seriously dating anyone, and they made it their mission to do us a "favor" and help them to see that... Instead of breaking up they both dug in deeper to the word both together and as individuals... If it was their goal at the school to divide them they failed... They are firmly cemented, and anyone who knows them can see they truly do belong together. His parents are just as supportive.
Would we have preferred they wait... Maybe, but not anymore...
So, that's what is going on here... Does my life make yours feel sane? I'm off to plan a wedding...
Thanks for listening,
PS... I've decided to call The Boy "Jackson"... Because it's his middle name and thats as creative as I can be... Since it looks like he is sticking around I guess he needs a name other then The Boy, so there you go.
My goodness! 1st Congratulations on having a daughter with enough sense to get out of a bad situation. 2nd Congratulations on the upcoming nuptials! 3rd Congratulations for not freaking out and driving them to run off...like some parents would. :o) Nice job!
ReplyDeleteCongrats!
ReplyDeleteIs 20 too young? That's when I got married. . . ;)
In answer to Mandi's question... I eloped at 18 and have been married over 20 years... So, nope... 20 is young but not too young! :)
ReplyDeleteWow! Congratulations!
ReplyDeleteYes, it's young. But you know your kids best :D My parents were 20 and 21 when they married, and 21 and 22 when they had me (a little over a year later), and they've been married 46 years now and going strong.
I didn't get married until 27, and had my kids from 30-35. I've often wished I'd had them when I was younger and had more energy!
Gee, that's a small college all right. Sheesh!
Julie
OH MY GOODNESS!!! Eeek! This is all VERY exciting ... please, please send Cate my love! Better get that cricut warmed up ... there will be lots and lots of important decorating to be done! ;-) -Allison
ReplyDeleteWowzers. You've had quite a week. First congrats on the upcoming wedding. I got married at 21 and 20 years later we haven't killed each other yet. :)
ReplyDeleteAlso? Is that college called Crazy College? Because it should be. Sheesh.
Congratulations! Happy time & scary time--speaking from experience. Our 22 year old son just got married this summer. : )
ReplyDeleteWOW! That was a lot to say! lol I can't believe that school... unbelievable. Congratulations though on the engagement! I look forward to reading about all the planning and such!
ReplyDeleteOh wow!! Congrats!! That's going to be some wedding based on the events you've planned before :)
ReplyDeleteAlso, I'm glad they decided not to continue in that school. It sounds crazy!
Wow, I'm sorry the college thing didn't work out. It sounds kinda weird...
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, 'the boy' needed a name since it sounds like there's another one in the works! :)